The myth surrounding DJ Mullet has been one of sublime fable and glorified legend; his tales of lore rival those of even the most powerful of Norse Gods.
Little is known about his true origins, only disproven rumors that have been circulated and distorted over the years that he appeared seemingly out of nowhere sometime during the late nineties/early aughts in a defunct Seattle dive bar where he was reputedly mixing all vinyl records on four different belt driven turntables while simultaneously taking “slap shots” with the surviving members of the 1988 Sea Gal cheerleader squad.
Mysteriously, however, even more is unknown about the true composition of his ethereally glorious bouffant. Some say his mullet is supernatural, feeding on the ambrosial nectar of nubile strumpets and lathered in the boiled blood of his enemies slain on the battlefields of yore. Others quip that it was scientifically developed in a field of hemp, then surgically grafted to his perineum and grown upwards into the base of his scalp.
All of this unsubstantiated prattle encompassing his tour de force has never been validated publicly, and the exaggerated gossip of his roguery have only embellished his prestige into mythological hyperbole. The stories of his nautical travels have been whispered to be the basis for many of the famous maritime novels of the eighteenth century, and hearsay of his philandering with high society members of public office and European royalty have caused political scandals and international incidents that have been written into the pages of modern global history. Ballads have been penned of his renowned waggery and folktales of his exploits are passed down through the generations.
The only thing known for certain is that his preference for loose women, high-grade marijuana, and rare hip-hop twelve inches has been the fuel to his celebrated success as the best Hair DJ on the planet.